Step 3 – First Contact

Step 3 - First ContactThe first message should neither be as short as “Hi, how are you?” nor too long and detailed to discourage or bore the other person from reading it. You want to get their interest straight from the get-go.

To achieve this, the list that you’ve done in step two will come in handy.  The goal of this first message is to successfully poke the other party’s curiosity and make them checkout your profile (your sales pitch / bait). At this point, if the bait(profile) is good, they bite! Now all you need to do is rail them in.

So, writing the first message is like casting the fishing line in the right spot. This is achieved by the notes you took on the profile the first time you read it. The reason why the profile got your attention and made you want to contact the person. Use this information to your advantage in this first message. Prove them that you read their profile and something caught your attention. Be honest and make the message about them, not about you. Try to avoid “me” and “I”, and focus on using “you” and “your”.

For instance, “Reading that you like … on your profile, made me realize that you are…”. Instead of “While I was reading your profile I realized that we have … in common and I decided to contact you. I think that… “. In other words, make the message about them! Tell them what you understood about them. You might be wrong or right, it does NOT matter. Why? If you are right, it means they have a good profile and you read it and they will see that you made the effort to read it and understand it. Meanwhile, if you are wrong, they will try to correct you and explain to you what you got wrong. Either way, they will answer you and they checked your profile! If you got this far, you’re golden (or almost).

To increase the response chances, try to throw in some humor, or something that can raise curiosity. For instance, if you both like skiing, you could add to your message a “PS” saying : “Since we both like skiing, if you want, I would gladly make you laugh by sharing some of my skiing adventures with you that would definitely make you smile”. This will raise intrigue and mystique in the other person, wanting to know more about you and contacting you.

Once you break the ice with this first message, it’s all up to your profile to do the work. If they answer back, you can go to the next step “Approach and Charm”, if not, you need to go back and work on your profile some more. Next Step – Approach and Charm